Friday, April 28, 2006
yes. the bug is going around and i'm hit.
went to sch for my 12 o'clock lecture. was about 10 mins late. after that followed a 2 hr break. the rest of them were gonna do their project so there was no room for me to be around so i decided to go to the club room. thought they were gonna eat first but nope.. so i left. went to settle the indemnity forms and liase with KC to see who's paid and whose indemn forms weren't in yet. after awhile, daryl had to leave. so i stayed on writing the receipts and stuff. den i lazed around in the room feeling shitty and sickly. my head was practically THROBBING.
so i left for home after that. walked down the staircase of the SAA foyer, which is where the rock climbing wall is, and saw cheok! hahas. actually i din notice him at first.. he noticed me and WAVED. omg. this is like the 1st time he acknowledged me in school la. usually he'll just look at me and smile. hahas. this is the 1st time he waved. good improvement. muahhahas.
my mp3 player wasn't charged... so i suffered the silence as i left for home alone. i decided to skip my 3pm tutorial because i just wasn't feeling too well. told my mom i needed to see the doctor and she said ok.
and when i got home, the lure of the computer was just too great. spent time on it and totally overlooked the rest i needed... so my headache kinda got worst. called my gramps to ask her to cook dinner for me and my bros. since my mom was going for her line dance classes at the club.. that meant we had no dinner. my mom said the clinic was opening from 7 pm-9pm again after they closed at 5pm and reminded me to go.
then it started pouring cats&dogs outside. but my gramps just kept calling so i had no choice but to leave... kept bugging my brother to go but he was just GLUED to the computer screen and kept asking me to leave 1st. had to try means and ways to threaten him so he would move but he refused to barge. so i called my dad and just left. it was thundering so badly and loudly i was frightened. yes. i was. imagine if the lightning striked me... oh no.. my dear life! hahas. so yea. awhile after i got to my gramp's. my bro came... lucky!!! or else my gramps would have been real mad. she wasn't quite in a good mood already.
my grandma!
strawberries for dessert.
yes.. what a spread.
had my dinner once i got there. hahas. what a spread la. as usual. my gramps cooks A LOT. and i mean A LOT. like she'd cook a portion of 5/6 for 2/3 people. yes. you can imagine. everytime i go there for lunch/dinner, she'd cook A LOT. and i will have to finish it or she won't be happy. so yeah. =/ my brother and i were just forcing the food down hoping our stomachs could enlarge.
after dinner, borrowed money from my gramps to see the doc cos my mom forgot to leave money for me before she left. think my gramps wasn't too happy about it. cos like she gave me an ang pow for my birthday just the other day and im asking her for money again. blarghs.
anyways, i left to see the doc while my bro stayed on to watch tv and accompany my grandma. and so the doc said, "better take antibiotics la ah". hahas. so yeah. i'm on MEDICATION once again. so annoying, hate it man. oh yes. and this is the first time i'm taking cough medicine in TABLETS. how interesting. heh. ;)
Wednesday, April 26, 2006
after having satisfied my hunger, i shall now satisfy my readers...
actually.. i'm just blogging before stephy pulls my hair out. muahahahahas. and soo... i complain shih han(rabbit) doesn't update her blog... and how ironic is it? i don't update mine that much either.. hahas. but anyways, i do update more "regularly" than my darling rabbit.
ANYHOWS...
i had physical training today. we ended up playing badminton instead cos i had the urge to play it so we booked the court. so we started playing and really got into it. just slightly into the game, daryl and i had this mutual thought. teck wee and si chao work very well together. and it was only then that i rememebered that how we play games is how we play life. so after a couple more rounds, i got them to take our my place while i observed them. a game that had no motives turned out to be a fruitful session. gathered several traits about each of them. i even got them to swap partners to see their group dynamics and realised that teck wee and si chao indeed had the BEST dynamics. *applaudes.
discovered a lot about them. singled them out individually to speak to them and motivate them. and it worked. x) in different styles of cos. at bout 2.50pm we stopped playing... and adjourned to the room to wait for a girl who's coming to collect the application forms for the FO camp and for debrief. When i was done with that girl, teng lui had already left. so i could only debrief the other three. a great session of badminton indeed. will organise more of such games to analyse their performance. ;) spectacular idea indeed.
and soo... i decided to go home early today. and imagine. we were done at about 4pm. that was like the earliest i was leaving school. so yeah. i'm glad... need more time to myself.. gotta catch up on school work as well. and ultimately, i need REST. was supposed to go see alicia zee but i told daryl not today. hahahas. i'm like too tired and i don't wish to see her YET.
was so tired i kept sleeping in the train. hahas.thankfully i didnt miss my stop. woke up just in time for my stop. hahahas. how lucky ehh? and amazingly, i have a tendancy fall asleep after leaving the stop before the stop i'm supposed to get off. so you can imagine... i have to remember to wake up. phew. yes. how fortunate of me.
i bought CHOCOLATES again. shit. seriously, i've been binging. i don't know why... my appetite has increased truck loads. and i'm gaining so much weight! i just can't stop eating. FUCK. i'm FATFATFAT!!! i need loads of exercise. someone motivate me. =( probably because of what's happening, that this is happening to me unconsciously. SIGGGGH. ARGHS. i need to cure this SICKNESS of mine. binging is BADBADBAD! *POUTS.
i realise time flies so quickly when you're busybusybusy. i kept thinking today's tuesday. when it's already wednesday. and it kinda reminded me that EU is approaching real quickly. how wonderful huhh? ;) amazing. time never flew THAT quickly. occasionally it did... but this time.. it's especially fast. i love this busy schedule.. though it drains me real quickly, but it's fruitful, accomplishing and satisfying. xDD
ok. time to hit the books and the bed. will turn in real early today to catch up on all the sleep i've lost. need loads of energy to carry out the many responsibilities i have currently. not complaining YET. hahas. ;) i probably will in time to come. but i will try to take everything in my stride and plan my time more carefully.
Sunday, April 23, 2006
i so wanted to go for mass in the morning... but i woke up too late AGAIN. next week, i MUST go lahh. but shit. i don't think i can again. hahahs. cos i'll be having training. oh wells. too bad. i'm sucha black sheep.
anyhows, jonathan CHIA woke me up at like 11+ to ask me out for lunch at CP cos adam was at his place. so yeah. i woke up and waited for my parents to come back home before i went over to CP to meet them. when i got there and finally found them, just nice, leanna and her gf walked out from KFC and greeted me. aahhh. hahahas. talked to her for a bit. and the two guys were so mean and they just walked away. grrr. oh wells. so we went to BK for lunch. jon's bro was with us as well. forgot his name though =x. hahas. and as usual, with these dude bitches around, you'll just be laughing your ass off most of the times.
the guys went to buy their food and when jon got back. guess what he said? "look at that girl serving us at the counter... her boobs are damn big man.. even bigger than yours." ok. 1) WTF? 2) like WTF? 3) WTF WTF? and so her boobs and damn big. and why does he have to compare it to mine? omg. =/ hahahas. but yeah. her boobs were like an E cup or an F cup. and she prolly can't find her size in singapore so she has to wear an undersized bra that makes her boobs ooze out from her bra cup. hahas. it's damn sick man. it's SCARY.
and so we crapped away while they had their lunches. and as usual, ah dumb just goes off jacking people and talking shit lah. he's the biggest bitch EVER. tsk tsk.
after that we left... jon and his bro left first since we wanted to walk around. after that we decided not to take a cab but took a bus to toa payoh. ah dumb followed me there and then took a bus from the interchange back to jurong.
and so i went to mindchamps to do my shit. after that met meng han and taught him maths. until we got chased out of the room, then we went macs to "study". i helped him with transformation, circle properties and some others. x) to think i could forget how to do some of the questions was quite an embarrassment. hahas. but i managed most of it. so it was all good. x)
and after that meng han's dad sent me home and here i am.
didn't exactly do much today but yeah. it's still good. xD
Saturday, April 22, 2006
today went by pretty well. went to school only for RWPS tutorial. came late so i sat with the guys. hahas. malcolm and weiliang are pretty cool people to hang out with. malcolm just keeps laughing at everything we say but is rather shy and quiet i must say. hahahas. but damn funny lah. he keeps falling asleep cos he's like damn tired. weiliang just talks a lot! and i found out he's from SAS... and the best thing of all, we have SOOOO many COMMON friends and to top it all off, he even came to my place before! hahahas. what a small world. *winks.
anyhows, i was really impressed and glad to find out that we ended cca drive with a total of 22 enrolments for FO camp! and that's a great achievement for us i suppose. xD good job to all committee members! we've still got the calling to do. i think once we hit 30 we will stop. *APPLAUDES. this made me really really happy.
and when i got to mindchamps, the assists meeting, i just went berserk and HYPER. hahas. i was practically the siao zha bor. talking rubbish and acting retarded. but yeah. i got the rest really psyched up! and that's cool. i just feel so young at heart with these assists around. and it's all good cos of the positivity i feel being around them. that's exactly what i need at this moment. thanks peeps for making my day a great one.
also, i would like to welcome three new assists into our team. they're all 14-yr-olds. and very very brainy kids i must say. there's zack, liangwei and baoyi. they're all from top schools... HCI, Dunman High and RGS respectively. can't wait to see how they'll perform at the next EU! x) welcome aboard guys. welcome to our big and welcoming and loving and friendly and outgoing family. "do not be afraid... step out of your comfort zone... and be the best you can be!" yayy. ahahas. i'm going psycho. i swear. ok enough of that shit. yeah. step up guys! and make it big!
after that went over for trainers aide meeting. it's so cool. i learnt how to juggle balls and really interesting stuff from celine. i love her la. she's sucha great mentor. and she's just so intelligent! gosh. i admire her really.
i swear i was pissed at bernie la. he was supposed to get my dinner for me. but like wth lah. an hour later and he's still not back. i called him several times but he didn't answer. went to look for him and realised he didnt bring his phone with him. called steph and found him with them, talking, laughing and joking away. like wth? and he hasn't gotten me my food. and all he said was, "i'm still eating". WTF? uggh. if you make a commitment to do something for someone, you shouldn't be doing what you did. it totally pissed me off. and when i told you to forget it, you still went to buy. arghs. don't you ever LISTEN? pfft. forget it.
after trainers aide meeting, went to macs to meet the rest of them. sadly, they were leaving. so we all left together. tim and i had like a "date" to go eat prata. hahas. but i had food and he was full.. den he suggested watching a movie. but i had no money. enough for the movie but not enough to go home after that. so we decided to go back. and he was nice.. he sent me home. hahahas. and then i told him to remind me of something i "owe" him. but i added, not today. hahas. and he kept questioning me what it was but i totally ignored him. ignorance is bliss. heh. anyways yea. he came over hoping to find out what it was but he was so wrong. so he left and went home. hahahas. bleahhs. i love games. *winks.
so that's about it for today. thanks to those who made my day a better one and to keep my mind off stuff. i love you guys so much. thanks for that overdose of love. also also, i was really happy to see steph. i missed her so much and i longed for her hug. x) she's my twin sister lah. i love her to the core. she's just amazing. ;) she totally understands and is always there for me anytime, anyday, anywhere. she'd just listen. and the best thing is she's tolerant of my nonsense, is patient with me and she consoles really well... I LOVE YOU. and you know it.
alrights. enough for tonight. GOODNIGHT!
Friday, April 21, 2006
HAPPY 17TH
BIRTHDAY
TIMOTHY PANG!
YOU'RE MINE!
MUAHAHAHAS.
hope you enjoy this special day.
forget all sorrows and focus on the joyous occasion.
and you better turn up for assists meeting.
i love you dude!
all the best...
and may all your wishes come true!
*winks. ;)
i feel so raw right now. it's like i've an open wound that's yet to heal. sigh. yes it hurts so bad. and it may never heal in fact... because it's a problem that may never be resolved. there's nothing much i can do really. just hope and pray for the best.
i just wish they know we i feel and how my brothers feel. siggh. and really, if this gets out of hand, i would wanna leave this place. too much pain to bear. but i will not abandon my pursuit for my dreams. it's something i've always wanted. and since what i treasured most may soon be gone, that's just something that may satisfy me best. something that can temporarily remove that pain. arghs. enough of this shit. i don't wanna start crying again.
i've gotta kick the habit of skipping classes really. and i ought to sleep early. it's weird how tired i get. but i'm so alive at night. yeah. night monster i am... but i've gotta learn to sleep early. i need that rest. didn't feel well this morning. but now i'm better after some rest. gonna go to school soon. just feeling horrible. out of that door... there's hatred, pain and coldness. i'm scared to walk out that door. what lies behind? it's now so unpredictable. i don't wanna hear hurting words that will just worsen my current state. siggh.
thanks to those who were there for me, trying to cheer me up, giving me advice and just to be a listening ear. i really appreciate it and i love you guys so much. ;)
what's next? i don't know. tell me...
i need love.
Thursday, April 20, 2006
when will you ever know that it hurts when you say things like that? do you know that i care enough that whatever happens affects me? my grades went down last year because i was really affected by what's been happening. you keep wondering why i didn't do well. now you know. and when i thought things have improved, i guess i'm just so wrong. it's all PRETRENCE. i come to realise that's it's all a scam. now that hurts even more.
when you appear like you don't care, it scares me even more. what happened to the happiness and love we used to have? has it disappeared? what happened to the unconditional love? you refuse to come along with us when we go on outings. WHY? what's there to prove? you asked for more outings, you have it. why don't you come along then? you asked for things.. and when you get it, you simply don't comply. WHY?
i wonder if all that you said just now was just to make me turn my back on him. because if it is, then it's a very mean thing to do. because it really really hurt me and my dignity. he is one whom i've respected since young. and by doing that, you've just crushed me so badly. but if it wasn't, and if it was true, then i'm very disappointed. though i can't deny i already am.
i don't know what's going on right now. i hear snippets of events. but i can't seem to put the pieces together. they all seem so complicated. if you want to judge according to the past, then it's true that it's all happening. but if not, or if there's another reason behind it all, then i'd wish to know. but how? i'm so confused right now. so lost.
i'm just very very hurt by your words. you've made me feel so alone and unwanted. i miss the old days. if only that event a couple of years back didn't take place at all.. then maybe now, everything would just still be the same. SIGH.
thoroughly disappointed and deeply hurt.
signing out...
Thursday, April 13, 2006
it's amazing to catch up with friends you've never met for at least two years. today, i met 2 of my friends from secondary school. what i meant was friends i had while i was still back in secondary school. after that we kinda lost contact? we went to the same school but different facs. it's funny. we've never met? and it's like we never managed to catch up with each other.
meeting up with long time friends is just cool. it's also really amazing how people change? aaron and i were just discussing how we were back in sec school and how much we've each changed since then. and guess what? it's quite a big change. aaron used to be this really irritating guy that you just refused to talk to.. cos with every word you say, he'll counter it with many more. so yeah. he was the annoying one. but right now... he's just really nice and sweet even. hahas. amazing eh?
shaun, in his ways, has changed too. he's got long hair now. both aaron and shaun dropped out from SP cos they realised how much they disliked what they were doing and decided to pursue their passion for music. ;) it's great that they're finally doing something they love and they're serious about it. wish them all the best.
hanging out with these guys again brought back many memories... the days i had in secondary school with my mates.. (girlfriends) all the other common friends we used to have and all the shit stuff we used to do together. hahas. it's hilarious really. and my dear aaron just couldnt remember so many things. it was just 2 years back. imagine if it was 10 years or 20 years from now? hahas. it was great to reminisce and bring back memorable times and just laugh at how silly, childish and immature we were back then. but it was all good. having fun, we were.. x) it was a great time i must say.
i've realised that we should, once in a while, catch up with friends whom we've lost contact with for eons. it's good to maintain a wide social circle.. and it still shows these friends that you still care for them and am still interested in their lives. like for me currently, it kinda feels quite empty and like my friends kinda disappeared.. many may just be feeling the same way. but you should take the initiative to ring up these friends. because... they may just be like you, sitting and waiting for you to make the first move. ;)
i enjoyed my day today. especially with my bitch, jillian, to accompany me for the 1st half of the day. i swear she really opens me up and makes me bitch along crazily with her. i just love her for releasing the shackles on me and just be the wild and crazy me i used to be back in secondary school. been constraining myself too much. x)
thanks to everyone who has made my day a memorable one.
Wednesday, April 12, 2006
After karaoke session on a wed night
ryan laughing oh-so-hard
we know he's really laughing hard
guess what he's pointing at?
DURIAN chendol.
he's dazed from too much beer.
pissed drunk.
after a few spoonfuls of durian chendol
laughing their ass off at durian chendol.
brent eating chilli on its own.
this is really hot i swear.
and this is our beloved durian chendol.
brent's suffering too.
no wait.
this is definitely before he ate the chendol.
dale's still not himself.
the two I.A.s
laughing his LUNGS out.
you bet we had a lot of fun.
the only time you see ryan laugh so hard.
brent looking for chicken rice.
sentosa day
laksa at katong after sentosa
mini golf at sijori's.
a nice moment captured of the 2 scratching heads.
on the shuttle to sentosa
brent already enjoying himself.
let's see who's the best...
brent won.
the two at at the top.
ryan enjoying his sugarcane
taken right below the chairlift, beside the luge.
are you thinking what i'm thinking?
yes. glenys is putting MASCARA..
FOR BRENT.
me and ryan on friday at katong laksa
the karaoke night itself.
ryan's enjoying
singing my sorrows away..
the 3 bros singing their hearts out.
too much beer...
i think i'm drunk.
er... heh. memorable. *winks
he's a great confidante
in the cabb.. hahas. being silly.
i've got two hotties!
my sayang and me.
dale's drunk la.
doggy photo of brent!
hmmm. was caught by ryan. tsktsk.
sending them off at the airport.
helping hafiz tie his hair.
he wanted to look like a dog.
brent and me on the chairlift.
brent and me on the open top bus.
2nd EU with my cats.
rabbit and me. (shih han)
me and melissa.
she's the winner for 2nd EU.
presenting..
stevie wonder!
my two revisits.
irvin and meng han.
my boobie dance partner, WEIKAI!
that's lata and me.
me + bimbo.
ij sisters!
hafiz and me again...
my lil sister, natalie!
shannon and me.
i look dazed.
sorry. gastric pains.
we love being silly.
brent presenting...
heart to heart HUG.
awwwwwww....
2nd EU assist performance.
we love tim's butt.
1st EU.
assist performance, 2nd EU
assist getaway at the back.
2nd EU
brent with BALLS.
too many actually...
the 3 boobie sisters.
the female assists...
1st EU.
the assist team! 1st EU
the graduates... 2nd EU.
the assist team again. 2nd EU.
the cats! 2nd EU.
the photos are a little jumbled up. sorry for that. but i'm too lazy to organise. it's good enough i left captions to let you know who's who and what's going on. hahas. have fun looking at them. took me quite a bit of time to do it up. hope you enjoy it. x)
the female assists...
