Monday, August 28, 2006
pulau hantu trip is approaching really fast.
i've been so busy preparing for it.
last touches...
the approvals, equipment, food, log, etc.
so many things to do.
and we're so pressed for time.
the biggest worry, MONEY.
*BOING....
but we're still doing fine.
can squeeze money from here and there i hope.
bleahhs.
alrighties. gotta get going.
meeting benjamin at tanah merah.
gonna get the gloves and other sailing equipment.
i've still got Team Building Camp to plan.
DANNGS.
proposal.... planning....
OH NO!!!! hahas.
nevermind. at least my hols ain't boring.
gotta go now. see ya.
Sunday, August 27, 2006
i'm so sick AGAIN.
down with an irritating FLU...
been sneezing non-stop.
anyways,
i'm still up doing p.hantu stuff.
cos the trip's next sat/sun...
and we've a lot of things to settle.
danngs.
i'm sick...
and i still gotta work.
gotta wake up early for training some more.
time to get some sleep soon.
waiting for the check list to finish printing.
baby's in camp.
i think he should be awake now.
cos he's going for his AHM run.
good luck baby! do me proud.
i'm always with you in your heart.
always supporting you yeah? ;)
I LOVE YOU!
missing you loads...
Thursday, August 24, 2006
it sucked.
big time.
i knew i could have done better.
siggh. i hate myself.
grrr. why am i like that?
i ought to change.
I NEED TO.
anyways, it's over.
but what the heck.
i may have to defer modules.
thanks to me skipping hrm paper.
oh wells.
come what may.
i have to bear the consequences.
life doesn't always come easy.
and i should not let pride get in the way.
i have not failed...
some people take detours in their life.
as long as i'm satisfied and happy.
anything goes. =)
to note: not many people are happy with their current lives.
i'm lucky.
Tuesday, August 22, 2006
EU's over.
i'm tired.
i'm missing it.
i can't walk! hahas.
my calves are so cramped.
i skipped a paper today.
cos i can't WALK!
uggh.
and i kinda din finish studying...
so i've to see a doctor later.
*yawns.
i'm lazy to blog.
sorry.
EU's just great.
missing everything about it so much.
and it was hella great..
to see brent dale and ryan again. xD
i love EMPOWER U! x)
Thursday, August 17, 2006
gosh. i'm so gonna flunk FMA.
uggh. my mind went BLANK.
i scribbled rubbish.
and i literally SCRIBBLED.
i am so dead tired.
i was up till 6am completing RWPS.
my lecturer gave me a chance.
so obviously i wouldn't wanna waste it.
or i'll have to repeat that module.
so retarded. i can never fail a language module.
i'm just.. too good!
hahahahas. KIDDING.
i'm just so brain dead.
during the 10 mins of reading for the paper,
i felt confident.
i somewhat knew how to do the questions...
but when i got down to doing it.
my mind went BLANK!
seriously... i was so frustrated with myself.
my mind couldn't concentrate.
and my eyes were just playing enemies with me.
what a nuisance!
enough. i pray i won't have to forward FMA.
it's a dreadful module.
please let me pass this sem.
i promise to work harder next sem.
*I SWEAR.
what jun sian (jk's bro) said to be motivated me.
he said he had several friends...
with gpas ranging from 2.1 to 2.6...
who got into australian universities...
HOPE! yes... so i'm gonna start working hard.
BUT. i need to clear this sem 1st. sigggh...
*crosses fingers.
PLEASEPLEASEPLEASE let me pass...
Wednesday, August 16, 2006
i so cannot concentrate!!
i'm soooo DISTRACTED..
and i totally have NO MOOD
to study! uggh.
what's happened to me? blarghs.
stupid stupid stupid stupid stupid.
i hate failing exams.
because i know i can ace them.
but why the hell am i letting myself fail?
danngs. what the hell is wrong with me man?
*smacks my head.
I NEED TO WAKE UP!
PINCH ME, KICK ME, SLAP ME!
ROARRR.
alrighties. enough of shit.
i've realised something.
i think i expect too much from people sometimes.
just because i can do it doesn't mean the rest can.
or rather, at the pace i do it, some others just can't.
simply for the fact that our schedules and priorities are different.
i reckon i have to understand that fact..
and stop expecting so much out of others.
BECAUSE...
it only leads to utter disappointment.
and i will only feel frustrated and agitated.
why do i wanna let myself feel so miserable?
that leaves me clueless.
and THUS, i've decided.
i won't expect much from people....
but i can expect MORE from myself. =)
because i know i can do it.
and i'm not gonna let the external environment affect me.
(too much business studies - econs + ssm)
ok. back to the books. bye!
Tuesday, August 15, 2006
yes. the exams have commenced.
i think i kinda screwed up yesterday's paper.
my mind just went blank for certain portions.
that's the lack of concentration.
something just seems to be so wrong with me.
i was never like that.
what has become of me?
nope. i can't let this go on.
i need a shift in energy.
i've just been letting myself...
be overcomed by some kinda bad energy.
letting lethargy and laziness get to me.
i need to do something about it!!!
i'll promise to study harder for the exams.
yeap. I MUST!!!
EU's coming! omg. it's like... 3 days away!
i must admit the distance has grown...
but the thought that EU is coming is just overwhelming.
the thought of helping the participants,
and being a part of their life changing experience,
it's just the best feeling ever!
yeap. i still love EU and everyone involved.
alrights. time to get back to the books.
i love YAHOO AUCTIONS! hahahas.
i'm hooked. =x
Friday, August 11, 2006
where are we headed?
why is this happening?
can religion separate a loving couple?
why does things like that happen?
i've seen it happen...
must it happen to me?
ordeals i've been through...
why must this be another?
i thought i've been through enough.
is this another turmoil?
another trial/test?
WHY? haven't i suffered enough?
why must you put me to the test again?
lord, you knew i'd give up anything for you.
but must you put my happiness to the test?
i've finally found someone i could be happy with.
why do you have to make me resort to sadness?
is this all part of your plan?
you're breaking me.
you're hurting me...
have i been overly sinful?
i need answers.
tell me....
answer me....
*cries.
i'm so stressed out right now.
tests, exams, school, reports, projects...
datelines, proposals, activities.
i wanna hide... go into hiatus.
i don't wanna face all these.
i'm so spammed with shit.
arghs. fuckkkk!
with a heavy heart,
a lost mind,
a throbbing headache and
swollen eyes,
i turn away in hope of answers.
i wait and wait...
to no avail.
is this the meaning of life?
a period of trials and tribulations?
to see who can withstand the longest?
the stronger you are,
the heavier tasks are bestowed upon you.
the responsibilities and duties grow...
so immense some just break down.
is this the meaning of life?
someone... enlighten me.
i need a break. badly. answers please...
Saturday, August 05, 2006
hahas. i am STUDYING.
weeeee... can you believe it?
yeah. i woke up from my nap..
and started copying my notes,
and revising them at the same time.
OMG.
hahas. yeahh.
stayed over at baby's last night.
watched movie with his bros, tat and mel
at GV yishun.
watch click.
IT WAS SO GOOD.
it made me cry.
made me realise how we should treasure our lives.
accept things as they are...
and not try to evade any moment.
damn has it woken me up.
from this big big nightmare.
CLICK is so good.
go catch it peeps.
and so that was to celebrate
his bro's 21st birthday.
hahas. so poor thing la.
his birthday was on thursday...
and he was in tekong.
and he had no one to celebrate with.
so i suggested going to watch a movie.
hope he enjoyed himself. ;)
alrights. i'm slacking now.
taking a break from copying notes.
gonna get ready soon to go to MC.
yeap. training for the assists today.
can't afford to skip anymore. xD
and might stay over at baby's again.
depending on whether he wants me there or not.
hahas. can't wait to sail the 420 tomorrow!
YAYYY!
BABY!!!
I MISS YOU! =(
Friday, August 04, 2006
i hate school!
i wanna quit school!
i just realised my report was due last week.
and i haven't even done it.
HAHA.
with that, i'm not going for classes.
fuck it man.
uggh.
think i'll need to forward modules.
i so wanna quit sch.
i still have one a half years more!
*GROWLS.
and to those idiots who tried to fail me.
try harder next time.
;)
uggh. i'm so bored lah.
gave my cousin tuition today.
den went to meet tat.
he accompanied me for dinner.
figured i was nearby yishun..
cos i was at bishan...
and i haven't had dinner.
so asked him out.
ran through the MPA approval thingy.
and informing sentosa and coast guard.
all related to the pulau hantu trip.
left the place at bout 11pm.
when macs was about to close.
oh yeah! khatib macs is now 24hrs..
on fridays and saturdays & eve of public hols.
;) it's prolly gonna be my next hideout.
(right. hideouts shouldn't be mentioned)
hahas. i'm spastic.
i'm so bored lahhh!
why are you asleep baby?
i wanna talk to you! =(
I MISS YOU!!!
and yes. dragon tiger gate's a cool show.
and so is lakehouse.
next up: click & the fast and furious: tokyo drift.
WEEEEEE! i've waited so long.
oh yes. i wanna watch my super ex girlfriend too!
i'm a movie freak. xD
ahh. i shall stop here
shall have an early night.
and wake up early to do my report.
i'm too lazy to do it now. ;P
BLEAHS. nights.
Wednesday, August 02, 2006
i'm so disappointed in you. you actually fooled me and took my emotions on a ride. you seriously didn't know how much i was panicking and worried about you. i simply didn't know what to do. only to realise that whatever you said and did was just an act. it just left me feeling so cheated alright.
sigh. i shan't go on. it just makes me more... irritated, annoyed, cheated and disappointed in you. i never expected you to do that me. i also never expected to feel that way again ever since i left my ex but you proved me wrong. it can happen again and anyone, even the person you love the most can make you feel the exact same way. siggh.
little did i expect that till now you still can't seem to cheer me up when i'm all down.. sad and disappointed... i can't believe that i actually tried to hard to cheer you up and make you happy... but you ended the day on such a shitty note. made me feel like crap. like all my efforts were wasted. somehow kindness doesn't beget kindness. it begets SHIT.
arghs. i said i wouldn't go on but i just can't help it. it's boiling... it's saddening.. it's disturbing!
=(
i'm just so irritated and grumpy today. cheer me up. spice up my day.
xoxo, time to go...
Tuesday, August 01, 2006
i don't know what's wrong with me.
i just feel so so so bored. so lonely.
went for pscm tutorial today.
and then went meet the lecturer in his office.
had a little chat with him and got my marks.
went down to the bizit library to return tang miao's book..
and then went to the lab to get some things done.
den decided to head over to the club rooom
to look for kian tat.
hung around for a bit.
nisa called (i called her earlier on)
decided to meet her in town for dinner.
planned to meet feez at her work place,
she's now working at le meridian
her dad opened a new branch there.
btw her dad owns some branches of
sarpino's pizzeria.
asked kian tat along.
met nis @ 630pm.
went in to look for feez.
chat for a bit.
den left for dinner.
took a bus down to far east.
had dinner at puncak.
walked around for a bit.
then left for home.
got home at bout 9ish.
babe's sound asleep.
gosh. i miss him so much.
just can't get him off my mind.
love him to bits. *smuacks.
that poor boy's so tired. sigh.
and i just miss him oh so much.
oh wells.
i've just been bumming online for a few hours.
wanted to copy my notes..
but i've been just hooked here.
shall go copy a bit and snooze.
gotta wake up early for class tmr.
can't afford to skip anymore lessons.
i miss you baby. =(
can't wait to see you tonight.
loving you so so so so so much.
*HUGGS&KISSES.
